Deaf Tranquil Life

Obsessions and Paranoia

                                   

In the past few years since I entered the Deaf cyberspace, I have observed a few people cyberstalking and cyberattacking other people, often out of personal vendettas.  Cyberstalking and stalking in real life are scary and are signs of a degree of unhealthy obsession, which creates fear and distrust among people who are stalked.  It's akin to practicing terrorism. 

Of course, many of people do "follow" the "celebrities" like writers, photographers, bloggers, vloggers, actors, etc...since the "celebrities" give permission (setting up their own "official" websites, FaceBooks, etc.)  I have a list of my "favorite bookmarks" that I "follow".   Of course, the fans might overstep a boundary, making the people who are followed feel that their personal spaces are impeded.

But when it comes to blogging and vlogging negatively about people the bloggers/vloggers can't stand, it's OK as long as the blogs and vlogs address the ideas, not the people.  If I see anyone attacking on a personal level that is unwarranted and full of immaturity and lies, then I make a decision to speak up or to remain silent, depending on how serious it is.  This time, I made the decision to speak up... ENOUGH to a particular person that I won't name.  This person has cyberstalked and cyberattacked a few people in the past.  So what if they have different opinions, but for some reasons unknown to me, this person has his own agenda... which strikes me as paranoia lately.

That particular person did cyberstalked a few people in the past and that person is continuing the path of cyberstalking, now to a wonderful person who is well-known and well-respected and her partner who is savvy in intelligence.  Now they, along a few others, are being threatened... that the stalker would "reveal" emails, etc.  Which again makes me question... why?  For what gain?  For what loss?  Can we just simply agree to disagree and let it go?  Sure there is catcalling... of course.  If one just simply ignores, the upheaval usually quickly dies down.  I have noticed... again and again... that people tend to get personal when one "disagrees" with the IDEAS, and that "personal feeling" turns to "personal vendetta".

"Personal vendettas" are usually better termed  as "obsessions".  Best cure is to ignore the person, realizing that it's just perspectives, opinions, etc.  Easier said than done, I am fully aware of it.  "Personal vendettas" do lead to paranoia, thinking that the world is "against" us/them.  People feel that a way to combat paranoia (often they don't know it's paranoia) is to be proactive.  So they "commit" a few or several things.  Like the Unabomber (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ted_Kaczynski).

Sadly, I am noticing one is happening now in the Deaf Cyberspace.  Ahhh... the level of maturity.

Enough.  If you have nothing nice to say, don't say it.  AND remember one adage...

"Great Minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people"--Eleanor Roosevelt said that.

Get over it, move on to greener pastures... which means time to talk about events and ideas.

 

My Father is Hearing... So What?

Ahhh... Candy is on the roll with her blogging, revealing a series of truths as she sees them.  I came across her latest posting about Deafhood and DBC (Deaf Bilingual Coalition) http://candysweetblog.wordpress.com/2010/11/17/truth-series-deafread-for-for/and I was somewhat taken back when I saw my name and my father's observation mentioned on hers.  So I went to Ella's blog which discussed deficit thinking and found the whole context of my father's comment.  It reads:

“Good Morning, Deficit Thinker. There is a universal need among humans to conceptualize life as “Us, vs. Them”. Since it is universal, I know I have been guilty of such behavior. And the best way to distinguish the good guys , “Us” from the bad guys, “Them” is to use an emotionally laden word or name. It simplifies complex issues. Name calling just feels so good, makes us feel so superior to the “Them”. Actually, deficit thinker, is one of the least offensive names I have ever seen. It is human nature to keep the rebel, the free thinker, the outsider, the nonconformist out of the “Us” group so not to contaminate the “Us” with dangerous thoughts. You see it in every walk of life. Must say I found Ella Mae Lentz’s comments clear and concise. As you said, it would be healthy for both sides to agree not to agree. I am sure the name calling helps to keep your blood pressure perking. Have fun. Love, Dad”

Ella's response:

“I was a bit concerned that you asked your father, which I assume is hearing, what he thought. I believe Indianapolis where you live has one of the largest group of most intelligent, deep, and caring thinkers in America and it would have been honorable if you recognized this important gift of Deaf people and discoursed this topic with them before responding.  Your father however made a comment that I saw as reasonable. I just hope you look inward and breathe deeply for a good while as I do everytime I read a blood curling comment or post. I keep telling myself, OK , OK , OK it’s not that person’s doing in its entirity. It’s the mentality that audism (and AGBell) has so cleverly planted in many of us. Sometimes, I ignore them with sadness..sometimes in anger…but I try to transform the anger into something productive and that pushes us ALL further in our Deafhood journey. NOT EASY, MIND YOU!“

To read more about it, you could check Ella's posting on deficit thinking out:

http://www.ellasflashlight.com/?p=63

Oy vey.  I was explaining the going ons in the deaf cyberspace with my father.  Now, addressing the deaf community in Indianapolis, it has its strengths and weaknesses, just like other deaf communities.  I prefer the deaf community here in Rochester, New York, due to its diversity which is lacking in Indianapolis... just my opinion.  I am used to the presence of the diversity of the deaf community, having experienced it for almost 2 decades in Rochester, NY, before moving to Indiana, so experiencing the a bit more insular deaf community in Indianapolis has been interesting...  Right now, Indiana School for the Deaf is experiencing hardships (triggered by the state budgets and the unrealistic expectations of parents.)

There, I have said it.  I wish the deaf community in Indianapolis and Indiana School for the Deaf well.

Now, I want to analyze the comments I just shared with you.  My father who happens to be hearing and I have always enjoyed the close relationship, which spans 4 decades.  We have open communication and I happen to have fond memories of evening "chats" with him in the sitting room where we discussed life... philosophically.  He made me realize that we all were human beings, with roles in the societies, etc.  Religions, family histories, politics, economics, you name it.  One might have noticed that I use the "it's just perspectives" statement sometimes on other blogs. 

Anyway, he's the one who installed in me the ability to appreciate the meaning of morality, to appreciate the diversity of humankind, to think before act, to walk a mile in anyone's shoes to understand where he/she is coming from, etc... and at the same time, he reminds me that he is just a human being with flaw, acknowledging his weaknesses and his struggles to become a better person, etc.  He treated and still treats me as a whole human being that he sees me and I try treating people the same why.  But like he always says, I am just a human being with flaws and I make mistakes and I ask myself everyday on how I can be better in my way.

There is nothing "hearing vs deaf", no colonization, etc. in our relationship.   It's just a special relationship between a parent and a daughter, built on love, respect, loyalty, and patience... my father mostly built it for both of us, out of his fatherly love for his daughter. Yes, we communicate orally and we don't sign at all and we already have our own love of communicating, exchanging our thoughts and feelings, etc.   Yes, when we don't understand each other, we repeat until we understand... we don't use "never mind" "forget it" etc.  He appreciates my desire not to miss out anything and he supports me.

I am aware that it does not apply to other fathers and children... heck, hearing parents and hearnig children have problems with communication as well.  I just happen to be lucky that I had parents who invested a lot in me and I am doing the same thing with my children.

Don't be too quick to judge, is all I ask.  I have met MANY wonderful hearing parents who have wonderful relationships with their deaf children... same as many wonderful deaf parents having wonderful relationships with their hearing children... no difference.  It all comes down to the desire of communicating and love.

I love you, Daddy.

 

Definition of Bullying...Explained.

Bullying with love.    Bullying with reason.

What? ~rubbing my eyes~  Did I actually understand a few people--especially ADULTS-- justifying the reason for their bullying acts?  Yes, they said that.

I am not going to give the links to their videos; instead I will just explain what bullying mean.

First of all, there are NO phrases for "bullying with love" and "bullying with reason".   These phrases are oxymorans.... contradictory phrases.  Bullying is WRONG, period.  What they keep missing the picture is the person or people at the receiving end.  People who are targeted end up being hurt... physically, mentally, emotionally, you name it.

Bullying with love equals tough love.  WRONG.  Tough love is a form of disciplining, with love in it, best left in the hands of parents or guardians of minors.  Bullying with reason... what reason, may I ask? 

I Googled for the bullying websites; there are MANY which address children, yes, but they can be applied to adults also.  I cam across one devoted to preventing bullying and it's very easy to understand... copied and pasted from www.stopbullyingnow.hrsa.gov/kids/what-is-bullying.aspx:

•   Punching, shoving, and other acts that hurt people physically
•    Spreading bad rumors about people
•    Keeping certain people out of a "group"
•    Teasing people in a mean way
•    Getting certain people to "gang up" on others

Also, from www.olweus.org, the types of bullying as defined:

    Verbal bullying including derogatory comments and bad names
    Bullying through social exclusion or isolation
    Physical bullying such as hitting, kicking, shoving, and spitting
    Bullying through lies and false rumors
    Having money or other things taken or damaged by students who bully
    Being threatened or being forced to do things by students who bully
    Racial bullying
    Sexual bullying
    Cyber bullying (via cell phone or Internet)

Now, the characteristics of a bully... from www.howtodothings.com/family-relationships/how-to-recognize-the-characteristics-of-a-bully:

• They characterize anxiety and intentional aggressive behavior
• They have a positive view of their behavior and violence in general
• Antics may range from intimidation to mockery, name calling, violence and cruelty
• They lack regard of what other people may feel  or insensitivity
• Hot tempered and easily provoked
• They usually have stronger physical built than their victims

What strikes me is this statement:

Many bullies think highly of themselves. They like being looked up to. And they often expect everyone to behave according to their wishes. Children who bully are often not taught to think about how their actions make other people feel.

It's no different from the adult bullies, hmm...

Plus...www.bullyonline.org is a really good website, even though its targeted audience is the workplaces.  It discusses the myths of bullying... important that you read them...http://www.bullyonline.org/schoolbully/myths.htm

BULLYING IS WRONG... there are NO phrases such as "bullying with love" or "bullying with reason".

 

A Short Movie Review--"Brotherhood of the Wolf"

                                                     

One commenter suggested in my recent blog posting about vampires and zombies that I checked the movie "Brotherhood of the Wolf" out.  I found and put it on the top of my Netflix queue.  I got it yesterday morning and after raking leaves, I settled down to watch it before heading out to the Nightmare Manor.  It was not what I expected; I actually thought it would be a gory, scary, fast-paced monster foreign flix.  It was produced in France and the story took place there, as well, during the pre-French Revolution (in which many aristocrats met their fates with the guillotine.)  Let me say that I am not very familiar with French Revolution...I do know that Napoleon Bonaparte came into power after the war.

I am not going to give out spoilers, so let's say it's a political, psychological, religious, sad, scary, frustrating, thought-provoking movie.  It gives a meaning to the beast... that we have beasts within ourselves and we have a choice to make friends or enemies with them.  The story focuses on chasing after the beast to stop it killing people...

Anyway, at the end, I felt sorry for the beast.  It happened to be existing in a wrong place at a wrong time, against its will.  At least it got a degree of respect and sympathy at the end.  That's all I can say for now... check it out ;-)

Update... here's a trailer:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D7DTv2uBA7I&feature=player_embedded

We the PEOPLE...

This time I want to briefly highlight the positive traits in the vloggers, bloggers, and commenters, former and current... what I have gleaned in the last four years in the d/Deaf cyberspace...I will name people in no particular order and briefly state a few positive traits that I have noticed and how they contribute to the Deaf Cyberspace.   This post is not complete; I will keep updating as I reflect on who contributed/contribute as time goes on.  If you want to add anyone's name with positive traits, or any more positive traits to already named people on this posting,  please comment and I will copy and paste to this post :-)  And... I challenge you to think of a good trait or two of anyone with whom you don't agree ;-)  Hey, there are several who I don't always agree with and yet I can think of good traits in them.  Unity and respect of all kinds of people call for  a building  of a village, right? ;-)

I submitted this link to this particular blog posting to DeafRead, because if not for DeafRead, I'd never gotten to know many people... in DR, DVTV, and ASLrocks.

 

 

Deaf Pundit--politically savvy, a keen eye on what's right and wrong, patient, solid as a rock.

Joey Baer--charismatic, delivering great speeches, thoughtful, heartfeeling--he's one of the inner forces for DeafRead to be up and running, bringing it to us. 

Barry Sewell--steadfast, independent, does not mince words, watchful, creative--I will never forget one videocomment of you showing the newly born puppies a few years ago in DVTV... a beautiful moment :-)

Ella Mae Lentz--a passionate lover of Deaf Culture, teacher, poet, strong heart, analytical in gathering support for the causes.

Ridor---oh yes, Ridor9th--intellectual, resourceful, able to grasp the meanings of the questions of life,  able to explain in the layman's terms, sharing his love of comics... Ridor... you have a LOT to offer, believe me. 

Russell E.--a strong parent advocate, proud, willing to communicate, with a surf board behind him ;-)

Barb Digi--gold heart, caring, cautious, a good listener, a strong supporter of Deaf Education, full of experiences---she will be one of the wisest Deaf Elders in a few decades from now ;-)

Aidan Mack--passionate, desire for learning, her crusuade for social issues.

Candy--thorough, level-headed, kind, keen-minded, interested in hearing all the sides.

Tayler Mayer--keen, ready to tackle the cultural issues, respectful, cool-headed.

MishkaZena--kind, caring, excellent researcher, ability to make us feel we are human beings.

White Ghost--funny, wisecracking, tough, knowledgeable of TV shows.

Joseph Pietro Riolo--his well-known ending line : "Public domain notice: I put all of my expressions in this post in the public domain."  Ahhh... yup, his constant showing his taking accountability of his words, being an example of how one comments with respect and thoughtfulness, asking questions instead of attacking... a bona fide, geninine commenter.

MikeZZ, DeafOIC--enjoys sharing jokes, his love of music, understanding of psychological issues.

Rachel--interested in life, passionate in sharing her experiences with us, kind, a gentle soul.

Dianrez--steadfast, gentle, not missing anything, thoughtful, not ruffling feathers easily, making us think and say, ah... thank you for your wisdom.

Ann_C--cool-headed, thoughtful, practicing a degree of neutrality, willing to change her way of communicating (like with Patti... Ann_C somehow easily picks up/plays off Patti's way of communicating, which is a delight ;-) )

Carl S./Kalalau -- a booksmart intellect, explaining the knicks of ASL, a cool storyteller of Dragon, a wine-maker amateur...

Patti Durr--ardent lover of truth, caring, a gentle soul, always willing to climb out on a limb.

Mike McConnell--intellectual, lover of nature, proud, cool-headed, thoughtful, funny.

Kim Ward--curious, caring, sensitive, humble.

HonBrit09/Kelsey--curious, caring, polite, smart, willing to listen.

Shawn/ASLForLife/PopeMistress--sensitive beneath her "tough lady" exterior, kind, enjoying a good laugh.

Paotie--lover of word play, expert at making people to take double-look at themselves, funny, wise-cracking.

Cobi Sewell/Ohbuckaroo--Respectful, kind, creative lover of animation art, quirky sense of humor, able to inject the lightness into the controversial issues.

Amy Cohen Efron--kind, curious, open-hearted, encompassing, heartful, considerate.

finlake--independent, wise-cracking, willing to listen to you even though he might not agree with you, quick to offer his handshake, thoughtful, acceptive of all kinds of people.

Rachel Chaikof--a gentle, kind, wide-eyed soul, loving to share her experiences with us, and willing to listen our POVs, and yet she has a strong head on her shoulders... currently she's studying in England as a graduate student in anthropology.

Shel, the Deaf Canadian--a no-nonsense, matter-of-fact, history buff, who listens and validates your comments.

John Egbert-Passionate and compassate towards Deaf children and their rights to access language fluently through ASL and English bilingually.

Tami Hossler- Strong supporter of Deaf Education, of Deaf Culture, kind, quick to be there for us, unfazed by our POVs.

Brenster-quick with words, willing to listen and to give a chance, does not mince words, able to look at different sides.

MM of At The Rim--a Welsh guy keeping tabs on the Deaf Culture in America as well as  sharing what's happening in the Great Britain's Deaf Community... dry sense of humor (hallmark of Great Britain, I believe), kindly listening to our causes, sharing his insight with us...

ASLNikki--a passionate student of multicultures in the Deaf Culture, an intense linguist in ASL, quirky sense of humor, oozing quiet self-confidence to people.

Crystal Sewell--warm-hearted, wise, kind, strong yet quiet supporter of all of us, especially Barry, sharing her insights and her ability to treat us equally.

Seek Geo--funny, wisecracking, open-hearted, caring, loves to share his travel experiences... especially his love of the TV show, Hell's Kitchen.

J. Parrish Lewis of Words in My Hands, Words in My Pocket--an self-established author of The Goblin Road, having a way with presenting his experiences to us as detached objective narrator, nonplussed and at the same time inquisitive.

DeafJeff of The Terlinguan--a poet who uses a lot on analogies in a sort of deadpan way, sees differently in what's happening in the Deaf cyberspace,  a deep yet detached thinker.

Zurfer of ASLMedia--an entrepreneur, one of several misunderstood Deaf people, creative in how to bring ASL to both Hearing and Deaf communities, willing to put up with a lot of doubts and questions about his creditability, tackling controversial issues with his unique point of view, not easily giving up when things get rough.  

Ben Vess--a blogger and a vlogger in his own right, something of one of a kind, making it clear that it's OK to have our perspectives EVOLVE, a very much human being, full of MWAHs.

BigBenFactor--a commenter/vlogger/blogger; he is a strong prolife supporter, willing to make points, willing to sit down and to tackle the myths and the facts without making any enemies.  His way of blogging and vlogging reminds me of a jabbing boxer :-)

Jodi of Am American Mom in Tuscany--sexy, pensive, full of life, sharing experiences with us like an open book, passionate in making sure that the Deaf babies get proper diagnosis and that the parents get access to information...reading her blog is like reading Eat, Pray, and Love in a  way.

Tousi--a new (I assume) commenter... he brings his insight into the blogs and the Deaf issues, a nice balance.  I am growing to enjoy reading his comments...

(e--a new blogger who addresses the issues in the Deaf Education (she works as a Teacher of the Deaf) and her creative approach to the certain Deaf terms (check out her videos), she brings a sense of patience to the cyberspace, and her ability to share her real experiences with us without getting offended, her way of validating her own experiences and helping us to see the parallels in the real life.

Don G.--An interesting character... his ability to explain the Deaf issues/terms clearly and his consistency in standing by what he beleives, his politeness.

iammine--a brown long-haired lady with graceful hands and smiling eyes, she shared her love of music (Pearl Jam!), her supportive stance for ASL to be taught to everyone, especially to the Deaf babies and children; my daughter who was 6 years old then made a video poem of iammine's dream. 

Jay Krieger--a philospher, quietly challenging us to think outside the box, to have moments of "I see what you say..." and  reminding us to just remember not to get heated, that it's just opinions.  Tall, orange-haired biker whose career has been in Deaf education (technology-wise)...

deafk--gentle, introspective, polite lady who usually leaves a calming effect in the Deaf cyberspace :-)  Her perky smiles and her sighs have us wondering what goes on in her mind and her sharing of her experiences has us nodding in agreement. 

ABCJohn--a cheerful comedian with WHITE teeth, who loves sharing jokes and stories with us, delighting in cheering us up and in seeing us chuckling, roaring in laughter, giggling, or just simply smiling.  I will never forget his sharing the video of his skydiving, with his wife Jill and his son... awesome!

Jill Lestina--a deeply spiritual, joyful lady who shared the tidbits of wisdom with us (like the scorpion story), who always has wide beaming smiles for all of us, who makes us feel good within ourselves, feeling we are OK.

LaRonda Zupp--a deeply spiritual lady who has come to embrace and celebrate Deaf Culture in a beautiful way, with a flirty twinkle in her blue eyes and an almost mischivious smile.   She shared her story of how she became deaf and how she journeyed to change deaf to Deaf.  

Oscar Serna-- an interesting guy with his hair in ponytail who is sight-limited, was one time a minister who decided to go to Gallaudet U. (his decision was inspired by Barb Digi's vlogs/blogs, as I recall from his v/blog.)  He is very quick to jump in the heavy discussions, voicing his opinions with respect and gives out his respect.  He is a good example of how  "respect" should mean in the Deaf cyberspace...

Jean Boutcher--a worldly sophiscated Deaf artist whose parents were translators in Europe, she grew up learning multilanguages, being an inspiring example to us that learning more than TWO languages is a wonderful goal for us Americans :-)

Jon Savage--a Deaf entertainer in his own right with impish wide smiles, he brings his love of ASL and  his love of surfing to us.  I will never forget his YouTubevideo ASL Poetry: Bully ASL...

DeafChip/David Kerr--a Canadian man who shares what's happening in Canada's Deaf community with us, cheerful, gregarious, whose concern for the welfare of the Deaf community is encompassing, very eager to explain the Deaf issues, willing to listen with patience.

Ocean--a Deaf feminist in her own right, she shared her experience of firewalking with us, teaching the true meaning of the "whole" psychology, her being able to live to the fullest as a full person immersed in different beliefs (paganism)... I have met her in person, so I am somewhat biased ;-)  She is awesome in person as she is in her blog....

Teri Sentelle--a very first vlogger of the Deaf Cyberspace, I believe.  Spunky, energitic, kind, mother of TEN children whose hubby is a chef ;-)  She had us enthralled with her "I Love Teri" videos, copied after "I Love Lucy" tv show and she shared the Zen stories with us...

JaceyJa--a commenter.  She got me enchanted with her special bond with her birds.  She is sweet, kind, thoughtful.

Insanemisha--tough, vibrant, not mincing words (she uses "balls" in a certain way ;-P), she has us watching keenly her, feeling the pulse of the Deaf cyberspace.  Recently she shared her experience about menopause... frank, raw.

About Patti Durr...

Moving on to... Patti Durr. 

http://handeyes.wordpress.com/

Before I continue, I want to make it clear that her blog is not on DeafRead's blog list; she's boycotting DeafRead over the disagreement with the owner of DeafRead.  So you'd have to find her blog outside of DeafRead.  Nevertheless, I want to put a spotlight on her blog.

Yes, her blog was and is still a puzzle for me sometimes.  When Patti first showed up, ending her comments with  "peace"... I wrongly thought she was avoiding any confrontation so she used the placating word to install some sort of calm in us.  Over time, I realized that to her, peace meant love, nothing more.  She has a unique writing style, using small case letters and at the same time she never violates the rules of English grammar... it's interesting.

I enjoyed her blog posting about the degrees of the acceptance of the Deaf community.  I learned that she was hard of hearing, growing up in a normal hearing family, etc... just like one of the majority (majority = deaf children of hearing families, as opposed to the minority = deaf children of deaf families.)  Anyway, check our this particular posting:

http://handeyes.wordpress.com/2008/01/05/finding-my-home-where-do-i-fit/

Also, she explored the meaning of Deaf Culture, what makes it a culture, etc. :

http://handeyes.wordpress.com/2008/01/02/what-the-heck-is-deaf-culture/

She has written some postings about social activism, using her favorite role models who are Gandhi and Martin Luther King Jr. as the examples of how to fight what she perceives as social injustices.  She'd engage the dialogues with people who might not see eye to eye with her; she'd explain her side thoroughly, using many examples.)  She'd ask questions and she'd acknowledge she has flaws and that she does stumble, just like us folks.

Oh, she and I do not always see eye to eye, but we respect each other and listen to each other.  I had seen her around in Rochester (she was newly hired at NTID when I graduated from there, 2 decades ago or thereabouts.)  Last month, a few bloggers and a few vloggers agreed to meet for lunch and that was the first time I met her in person ;-)  She is a gutsy, giggling, cheerful RED-haired lady.  And she does hug!  Heh.

Patti... you are a human being and you have an ability to apologize and to forgive, which makes you unique.  You can have conversations with some people who are not well-liked in the Deaf cyberspace and making some of us feel we are accepted.

Peace.

Different Opinions Resulting in Questionable Behaviors

In the light of what's happening among the vloggers from another Deaf aggregator nowadays, I want to step on the soapbox to share what I have been witnessing in the Deaf-centered aggregators over the last 4 years.

I have seen again and again at how the people react when one finds himself/herself disagreeing with a certain person's perspective... the feathers are usually ruffled and then some people would either/both blog/vlog about it, targeting certain people they disagree with.  Sometimes one would go far to commit prejudice (sexism, ageism, you name it.)  Amy Cohen Efron explained her experience with the harassment which got so bad that her workplace was contacted by whoever disagreed with her blog.  Several people have had their employers contacted, just merely because the callers disagreed with their opinions.

http://www.deafeyeseeit.com/2010/09/24/disillusionment-with-the-deaf-community/

I want to state that I SUPPORTED one's contacting another's workplace because the employee used his students to investigate on one certain vlogger's background and he revealed the vlogger's personal information online, as well as he mocked fun of her sexually... that is sexual harassment :-(  Of course, a few other vloggers mocked fun of her sexually as well.  That I do NOT support...  The point is when one disagrees, one does NOT have to resort to emotional and sexual harassment just to have an upper hand.

Sure makes the cyberspace a fun place to feel safe in, huh? Not...

I do remember four years ago, after the Deaf Bilingual Coalition's first convention held in Milwaukee, WI, amid the disagreements and agreements, I came across one blog that stated a letter was sent to one core member's employer and I was taken back by it... why would one go that far to contact one's employer?  I mentioned it in a few comments, making it clear that I was disappointed with that action and that even though I did not always agree with the core member, I still admired her a lot (even today I still admire her.)  As soon as the word spread around, the information about the letter supposedly sent to her employer was removed from DeafRead, so even to this day, I have NO idea if it actually was sent to her employer or not.  But... oh man, I believe that was my first witness of the harassment which got out of the cyberspace, affecting the real lives of bloggers/vloggers. 

Sure, I disagree and I don't mince words over it.  So what?  But actually overstepping the boundaries... not in me.  I respect people's PERSONAL boundaries, even the ones I am not crazy about.  That's called RESPECT.  

Whatever happens in Deaf cyberspace... stays in Deaf cyberspace.

 

UPDATED:  Candy's posting: 

http://candysweetblog.wordpress.com/2010/10/07/confronting-bullies/

About Amy Cohen Efron...

Ahhhh... YES!

AMY COHEN EFRON!!  The owner of DEAF WORLD AS EYE SEE IT blog (http://www.deafeyeseeit.com/)...  She shot to the category of the well-known, well-respected v/bloggers with her famous vlog called "The Greatest Irony" in which she explained how the hearing community would use American Sign Language (ASL) to the hearing babies, encouraging the early development of language and cognition while ASL was not encouraged to be used on the deaf babies.  Luckily, I viewed her vlog before she decided to market it...

http://www.deafeyeseeit.com/2007/03/17/the-greatest-irony/

This video was a catalyst for Deafhood and Deaf Bilingual Coalition, to name a few, to become more visible to us.  What she did was to make us aware of the benefits of ASL... the benefits are so great with hearing babies, the deaf babies also benefit from it, which is something we forget.  From it, the arguments over which is best for deaf babies arose and to this day, we still argue over it.  I have to admit I was a little suspicious of her, whether she had a motive, etc., but as she continued blogging, I came to realize that she was a honest, courteous, caring, wise person who had an ability to understand where we came from and she encouraged us to keep expressing our opinions.  She listens to us, making us feel we are heard.

Over the time, she had observed, with a sense of dismay at how mudslinging rose in DeafRead and DVTV, and she attempted to blog about it.  She explained the meaning of respect and boundary, trying to install in us how to v/blog in a more respectful way...  at the end, it quickly clear to us that respect was relative and that everyone had his/her definition of boundaries.

http://www.deafeyeseeit.com/2009/10/

She campaigned for the better accessibility to the technological means for deaf people.  She questioned Sorenson Video Relay's way of handing finances; she challenged Netflix to add closed captioning to streaming movies; she discussed her thrill with iPad; etc.  She has covered a WIDE range of Deaf-related subjects with a thoughtful, questioning, positive, curious attitude, with her wide grin and her alert eyes.

May you continue blogging...

About Jay Krieger...

I have always enjoyed Jay Krieger's "See what you say; Say what you see" blog in which he combined Zen into his life experiences, with a somewhat detached sense of humor, using the "here, I see what I say; I say what I see" philosophical approach.  Before I continue, I want to say that he has not kept with his blog since the year of 2008.  His blog is:

http://seesay-jay.blogspot.com/

In the vlogs, he had stressed again and again that we were just human beings with opinions, nothing more.  For an example, he discussed the human beings' tendency to label:

http://seesay-jay.blogspot.com/2007/03/philosophy-behind-labeling.html

Other times, he shared his quirky sense of humor, which I have enjoyed, such as:

http://seesay-jay.blogspot.com/2007/03/nature-calls.html

and...

http://seesay-jay.blogspot.com/2007/03/nature-calls-female-version.html

He shared his love of motorcycles, sports, Deaf education (he has made several good vlogs about Deaf education, due to his career being in Deaf schools), controversial issues such as cochlear implantation, designer babies,  to name several.  He had an ability to step outside of any controversial issues, just to observe and to mull over in his mind, not getting too emotionally involved, so he never really got "flamed".  One time he emailed to me to remind me not to get too involved in the "issues", to respect other people's perspectives and I took it to my heart and to this day, I try to remember his advice.

Overalls, he showed his ability to understand what made Deaf community click and an ability to explain Deaf Community in a common sense way, that made us to understand and to say "Ah, I see what you say."  I am sure, today he's just riding on his Harley Davidson, just enjoying watching the landscape passing by.  I hope he's doing well.

About Barb Digi...

Now, moving on to another blogger/vlogger...

The owner of the Deaf Progressivism, www.barbdigi.com/, devotes her spare time to blogging/vlogging about Deaf Education and Deaf History, which are close to her heart, since to her having spent almost two decades in it, first as a History teacher and recently, as a Bilingual ASL/English specialist.  She shows her specialty which is a thoroughness in gathering, organizing, and presenting data to us in a layman's terms so that nothing would go over our heads and would encourage us to raise our hands to ask questions and to share our responses, like students.

When she first appeared in DeafRead in the year of 2006,  she shared her love of Deaf history with us.  From her, I first learned of old films from Gallaudet U., especially the ones about the sign "Deaf-Close" and that was the first time I heard of  George Veditz. Here are the links below for viewing... they are interesting:

http://deafprogressivism.blogspot.com/2007/03/which-is-first-ear-close-sign-or-ear.html

http://deafprogressivism.blogspot.com/2007/03/me-hold-my-guns-let-me-show-you-my.html

http://deafprogressivism.blogspot.com/2007/03/bite-your-bullets-cowboys-let-squaw.html

Then there is her blog/vlog about one of the Mississippi's colleges which had deaf education showing a lot of emphasis on oral methods and very little on bilingualism and she expressed her concern about it.  She got several strong reactions.  She held her ground very well... so well that she was invited to join a team to give a presentation on bilingualism in education at Mississippi School for the Deaf last month (August, 2010.)

http://deafprogressivism.blogspot.com/2007/05/what-kind-of-deaf-ed-teacher-prep.html

http://deafprogressivism.blogspot.com/2010/09/jump-starting-bilingual-education-at.html

Yes, she has had many roles such as being involved in a few organizations, working to bring awareness of the need for language to Early Hearing Detection and Intervention, promoting Beethoven's Nightmare which is a music group consisted of Deaf musicians, to name a few.  Meanwhile she has been holding down a full time job, working at a Deaf school, raising her two Deaf children, traveling, and fighting keeping algae at bay in her swimming pool.

As in her vlogging and blogging, in real life with her twinkling eyes, she shares her quick wit, her warm personality, her thoroughness, and her empathy with us.  May she continue blogging and vlogging about what ever inspires her heart so much that she wants to share with us...

:-)